The Zombies Are Coming!

Occasionally I have to take a break from writing related posts to bring you something terribly entertaining. This is "Paranormal Point of View" after all. So when I saw this on The Colbert Report I HAD to share it with all of you.

The Colbert Report
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I've been busy promoting and enjoying my new anthology JOURNEYS OF WONDER. I appreciate all the support you've given. You are all amazing! If you haven't read my interview on the process, I'd love you to check out Julie Musil's post when you get a chance.

A Writer's Holiday

I thought we'd pause in the midst of all these awesome questions you guys had and breathe for a minute. No matter what you celebrate, I hope you take the time to truly enjoy this holiday season. Hug the people you love, eat something yummy, and live for the moment. 


I'll keep posting until the New Year - I haven't taken a break yet!!! BUT I'll keep it light and hopefully fun. I will return to answering your questions in 2012.


This is a video from last year, I believe. But it's a classic (just my style) so ENJOY!! 


A Very Zombie Holiday!

Keeping an Open Mind

Happy Halloween!!! In honor of one of my favorite days of the year (I'll keep you guessing on the others), I am reviewing Susan Kaye Quinn's book, OPEN MINDS, which debuts tomorrow. Why this book on All Hallows Eve? Let me ask you - which is scarier? Someone with the ability to not only read minds, but control them? Or This guy? 

photo credit

Yeah, okay he's creepy, but I could take him. Or at least run away. In fact, he's the one I chose to interview about the book! And believe me he was difficult to get on Halloween. I had to promise lots of brai- uh, never mind, let's just leave it at he was tough to book.


Me: What did you think of the book OPEN MINDS?


Zombie: GWAAAAMAAWEEEEEEEGOOOOO. *thumbs up or at least some appendage pointing skyward*


Me: Very, um, descriptive. So did you feel it was an authentic teen voice with a good story arc and pacing?


Zombie: *lunges*


Me: *ducks behind furniture* Sorry! Sorry! I forgot - no big words. Was book good?


Zombie: MWAAAEEEEEEWWWWAAAAAA *Another thumbs up*


Me: Agreed. 


I thought Susan did a great job keeping the excitement coming while delivering on an authentic teen voice. This book was unique and that may be the best praise I can give because that is tough to find. She didn't pull any punches as we talked about the other day. Now if you'll excuse me, my guest is looking hungry. *gulp*

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PRIZES!

Susan Kaye Quinn is giving away an Open Books/Open Minds t-shirt, mug, and some fun wristbands to celebrate the Virtual Launch Party of Open Minds (Book One of the Mindjack Trilogy)! (Check out the prizes here.)

Three ways to enter (you can have multiple entries):

1)      Leave a comment here or at the Virtual Launch Party post

2)      Tweet (with tag #keepingOPENMINDS)

Example: When everyone reads minds, a secret is a dangerous thing to keep. #keepingOPENMINDS @susankayequinn #SF #YA avail NOW http://bit.ly/SKQOpenMinds

Example: Celebrate the launch of OPEN MINDS by @susankayequinn #keepingOPENMINDS #SciFi #paranormal #YA avail NOW http://bit.ly/SKQOpenMinds

3)     Facebook (tag @AuthorSusanKayeQuinn)

Example: Celebrate the launch of paranormal/SF novel OPEN MINDS by @AuthorSusanKayeQuinn for a chance to win Open Books/Open Minds prizes! http://bit.ly/SKQOpenMinds

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When everyone reads minds, a secret is a dangerous thing to keep.

Sixteen-year-old Kira Moore is a zero, someone who can’t read thoughts or be read by others. Zeros are outcasts who can’t be trusted, leaving her no chance with Raf, a regular mindreader and the best friend she secretly loves. When she accidentally controls Raf’s mind and nearly kills him, Kira tries to hide her frightening new ability from her family and an increasingly suspicious Raf. But lies tangle around her, and she’s dragged deep into a hidden world of mindjackers, where having to mind control everyone she loves is just the beginning of the deadly choices before her.

Open Minds (Book One of the Mindjack Trilogy) by Susan Kaye Quinn is available in e-book (Amazon US (also UK, France and Germany), Barnes & Noble, Smashwords) and print(Amazon, Createspace, also autographed copies available from the author).

Don't Be a Zombie When You Write

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You're in the mushy middle, trudging along, plugging away at the keyboard. Maybe you have an outline you're following, maybe you're just pantsing your way through. But your brain feels as mushy as the second act, and you keep losing focus and checking your Twitter feed. You forgot about a blogpost you meant to check earlier, your kids need craft supplies for their school projects, your car needs an oil change...


Sound familiar? You're turning into a writing zombie.


We've all been there. It's hard to focus, especially when you feel like you're trudging uphill through sludge. 


What can you do to prevent staggering around your neighbors lawn searching for flesh? Or at least becoming lost in your manuscript and never making it out?

• Take a break. Go take a walk or watch your favorite show. Read a good book! Anything to have some you time.
• Throw something bad at your MC. What can you toss in there that will make her life that much harder? Go for it! See what happens.
• Be a method actor. Try doing something your character enjoys that you don't. Singing? Running? Cooking? Try bonding with them. Maybe you'll figure something new out about them based on your experience. 
• Take a detour. Do you outline? Do you have an idea where you're going? Change course. Ask your character to do something unexpected and see what happens. Don't think he would? Give the choice to another character and see what happens. You can always take it out, but it might get you thinking along a brand new line.
• Change your routine. Do you normally write at night? Wake up early and write for an extra half hour. Take your laptop or a notebook to the park or a coffee shop. Switch your chair. 
• Call a friend or critique partner. There's nothing like writer peeps to help you out when you're down. 

What else can you do to prevent turning into a writing zombie?

Why Vampires are Better Than Zombies

Don't forget to enter my contest and help support a good cause at the same time!!

Now the post:

I know I'm going to catch some flack on this one, especially from you zombie fanatics out there. And I freely admit that there are the exceptional few zombies I find endearing. But they are relatively few and far-between. Why is that??

1. Vampires are sexier. Would you want to kiss a guy (or girl) with rotting chunks of flesh falling off? Doubtful. How about a hotty who's frozen in his eighteen-year-old body forever?

2. Vampires have an intact brain. Zombies are always trying to eat others' brains because they can't fill that empty, rotting (I'm thinking this word might appear quite a few times in this post) spot.

3. Vampires are scarier. Uh-huh, I went there. Seriously though, lumbering undead slowly plodding toward you to eat your flesh is scary, but not in comparison to the type of monster who hides in the shadows and can infiltrate your mind before feasting on your blood.

4. Vampires have better manners. Everyone knows zombies are just plain rude. Vampires can't even come inside without being asked.

5. Vampires are SEXIER. I know, I mentioned it already. But seriously - you tell me which one is more attractive??

I rest my case.

Photo credit for Zombie pic

Photo credit for Vamp pic

Ban This!

I have a suspicion. Something that began as a wisp of a thought somewhere in the back of my mind. Something that's taken shape the more I think about "banned book week." You see, I believe the whole thing is part of a greater conspiracy. Those individuals that ban books (or try to) have somethings in common.

At first I tried to figure out what it was that might make a person ban a book - particularly a fantasy book (see this post on Enchanted Inkpot from Monday). Then I realized that probably wasn't it. I mean yes, sadly unicorn attacks are on the rise (we'll be discussing Unicorns V. Zombies sometime soon I promise). But that can't account for all of this foolishness. It seems like more and more people join this fight every day. On the wrong side. Yes I just said one side was wrong.

So lets take a look at the facts together shall we?

* Mindless hord mentality. No pitchforks as of yet.

* Trying to stifle creativity, imagination, knowledge, understanding and most higher brain function

* Personal needs are more important than those of others, and all must comply

* Attempting to keep others in the dark and shut down open lines of communication

* Frightened of big shiny things like ideas

* An undeniable hunger for devouring the brains of others

Okay, maybe that last one is debatable... But darn it, it fits!! Don't you see? They're ZOMBIES and they're slowly taking over. I say we check their eyes because that's how you can tell. Rotting flesh can be covered up, but the eyes will still look glassy and vacant. Though frankly, I'm not sure I would be willing to get close enough to verify this information.

So how do we stop it? Don't let them devour the brains of our children. keep those brains healthy and strong by encouraging reading of all kinds. Whatever lights that fire behind their eyes, so they don't become glassy and vacant like the others. Then THEY cannot reproduce.

We Have a Winner!! And a Little Poem

We have a winner!!! But the rest of you should not despair. I have yet another amazing contest coming up next week. So please stay tuned.

In the meantime - Congratulations to APRIL!!! You won a copy of PARANORMALCY by Kiersten White.

Now, this week happens to be a little busy for me, but you are all so very important to me that I had to do something for you. So here is the very first poem that I ever put up on the Undead Poet's Society, the one that made me a charter member. A little flashback full of Zombie love.

The Zombie's Point of View

by,

Lisa Gail Green

It’s all I can think about,

all I can see,

wherever I look,

they’re calling to me.

Oh yes, they are hiding,

inside of their shell,

and I know what you’re thinking -

I’m going to Hell.

But really how can I?

I’m already dead.

And it’s not like there’s much

left inside of my head.

Just a ravenous hunger for

what’s inside yours.

Oh, I used to like muffins and

tacos and s’mores.

But now that I’m dead,

those things will not do,

I have to have slimy,

and squishy brain stew.

Scratch that – don’t cook it,

it’ll lose all its flavor,

the meaty thick texture

that I love to savor.

It’s not like I asked

to become walking-dead.

But now that I am,

it needs to be said.

I may not be fast,

but I’m very persistent.

So sit back and relax,

it just hurts for an instant.

The Zombie Next Door

Is your neighbor's lawn an eyesore? Overgrown weeds and dead grass?

Do you hear strange noises coming from his house at night?

Does he stumble outside to retrieve the mail looking pale and stiff? Does he chew on the letters on the way to the door?

When you try to make small talk, is his only answer "waaaaaauuuuuuwwwwhaaaawooooo?"

If you answered YES to at least four of these questions your worst fears might be realized. Well, that is to say only if your worst fear is ZOMBIES!

So what do you do now? Barricade the windows and door and pull out that axe your spouse complained you'd never use?

Such drastic measures are probably not necessary. Particularly if it is a contained instance. Chances are the Zombie only wants to live in pieces. Oops, I mean peace. So what do you do? Well I recommend taking the following precautions:

1. If you haven't already invested in a pet go out and get yourself a nice Werewolf or Goblin. They enjoy chasing Zombies and he won't dare come around your property.

2. Leave a map with directions to the nearest graveyard on your door along with a party invitation. It's a little known fact that Zombies love a good soiree.

3. Play Barry Manilow CDs at top volume, repeatedly. No offense to Mr. Manilow, but for some unknown reason the frequency of your voice sends Zombies into panic mode.

And finally...

4. If he comes to call with a measuring cup saying "brains," you have two choices and whether you decide to slam the door or go get your spouse... well, I guess that depends on the quality of your relationship.

A Zombie Ate My Review!

I want to introduce yet another potential new feature to my blog today. There are oh so many book reviews out there, but are there any books reviewed by supernatural creatures? Well, now there is. And since Carrie Ryan's paperback, The Forest of Hands and Teeth debuted this week at #5 on the NY Times Bestsellers list, I thought PERFECT! I'll just find myself a zombie to do a review.

Well, silly me, Zombies aren't exactly the best choice for anything intellectual like a review. Let me demonstrate by showing you what happened:

Me: So did you read the book?

Zombie: AWWWAAAHAAWWWAAAGHH

Me: Uh huh. And did you like it?

Zombie: AAAVVRAGAWAAAHAAASHAA

Me: Did. You. Feel. It. Was. A. Fair. Depiction. Of. Zombies?

Zombie: AAARRRRGGRAWWAGHHFFLAAA

Sigh. I promise to do better next time. I think it's worth another try don't you? Only next time I'll use a reviewer with an intact brain. In the meantime, let me give you my own opinion on the book.

It was a beautifully written page-turner. I couldn't put it down. The dark and oppressive feel of the ever-looming forest of hands and teeth could not squash the fire within the main character, Mary. I wanted Mary to succeed (and by succeed I mean not die a horrible death). Does she? You'll have to read it to find out if you haven't already. The sequel, The Dead Tossed Waves was just released as well and I can't wait to get my hands on it.

Was the depiction of Zombies realistic? It certainly painted them in a negative light. All they really want is human flesh. Maybe someday we'll read a book from their side of things. Come to think of it though, it might be awfully short if my review experiment is any indication...