The Impatient Fairy - a writer's fairy tale

Once upon a time I wrote a blogpost called the Ogre and the Slushpile. Others seemed to enjoy this, so I thought I'd give it another try with my newest story, The Impatient Fairy. I hope you enjoy. Oh and don't forget to enter my contest!

Claire didn't like being a fairy. Of course she enjoyed the whole being absolutely beautiful and able to wield magic parts. But other than that it kind of sucked. So she decided to do what she'd always really wanted and became a writer.

At first Claire wasn't sure how to become a writer. Then she decided for lack of any better instructions, to just start calling herself one. The only trouble was, then the rest of the fairies all wanted to read something she'd written. So she locked herself in her hollow tree stump and wrote. In only a few short days she had the world's greatest masterpiece in her possession. It was 200,000 words long single spaced in a lovely curly font, and it was titled, THE BEST BOOK EVER.

Claire flew right over to the biggest publishing company she could find, and handed it to them. "Today's your lucky day," she told the editor, whose mouth had fallen to the floor. "You'll want to get this out right away."

Now it isn't every day that a fairy flies into your office with a manuscript, so the editor decided to forgo the usual lecture in these situations and actually take a peek. Wouldn't you be curious? Unfortunately after the first page, she shook her head and said, "Miss Fairy, I'm afraid this isn't for me."

So Claire turned her into a caterpillar and flew to the next publisher. After ten editors she couldn't hold back the tears. She was so certain her book was perfect. Plus she was sure to get in trouble for over-inflating the caterpillar population.

Claire had a lot to learn. And as we all know fairies are quite impatient. So after another couple of days on the internet, she sighed heavily and considered giving up. Apparently this writing thing was harder than it appeared. But Claire was determined. Plus all the other fairies were starting to tease her. And she couldn't have that.

Claire worked, and researched. Read and studied. Even joined a critique group over email (lucky for them she couldn't do her caterpillar spell through the computer). Finally, a year later she had a manuscript she was confident was ready.

This time she queried agents. She used a little fairy potion to help her out, and she landed one almost right away. Claire ignored the part of her that said she was cheating and got ready for the offers to roll in. When they didn't, her agent assured her that these things just take time. So she waited. And waited. And waited. She waited for an interminable three whole days!

Claire decided to use her potion again. And she had an offer within an hour. Then she had to follow the editorial notes and revise her whole book all over again! After several of these horrible interludes, she was told her book would be ready to release in eight more months. Eight months! Claire threw her arms up in frustration. Clearly there was only one thing left to do.

Claire settled into her feather bed and used a powerful magic potion to put herself to sleep. That way she wouldn't have to sit around waiting, she could just bypass it all and wake up famous. And indeed when she woke, she rushed to the bookstore to find her own book at the top of the best seller list!

Claire patted herself on the back, and flew home to check her email. She skipped to the most recent messages to find that she owed her editor and agent the second book in the series and an outline of the third. Claire's eyes teared up. She had to do all the work all over again, and she missed out on all the fun of watching her book release and hearing from the readers. Claire decided to quit writing and go into acting instead.

The moral of this story? Be patient because if you can't enjoy the process then what's the point? Oh and if you aren't a fairy don't go barging into an editor's office. Just stick to querying.